You are a piece of art and, understanding who you are, is an art in itself.
The big counter-intuitive secret to all of this is: Part of the art of "finding" yourself, is losing yourself.
Sounds kind of guru-y right? I apologize, but it's true.
Most people do not come out of the womb knowing exactly what they want to do with their lives. It is a struggle to find our gifts.
Rumi says, "The wound is the place where the Light enters you." (That definitely sounds guru-y!)
Here is what I have learned coaching thousands of people over the years: when someone is in enough pain, they will either change for the better or give up.
The ones who change for the better must suffer to find out who they are, what they are made of, how to switch from victim to champion, and how to use what they find to help others.
The ones who give up cannot, will not or feel they cannot make any other choice. This is nothing short of a heart-wrenching tragedy!
Their lives become fear-filled, angry, sad dramas in which escape seems more and more impossible. However, my experiences have taught me that, if they are still breathing, there is still time to change it around.
Ask any successful person how they found out what they wanted to be successful at and you will almost always find that a painful moment was the catalyst that launched them into their best Self.
Ask around and see for yourself. We'll wait...
As the pain turns into healing growth we find new ways to lose ourselves using tools like prayer, meditation, gratitude, teaching, physical movement, creating art, sharing, building, gratitude, etc.
And, the more we lose ourselves in our best practices, the more we find out who we are and what we can do with our lives to help others.
Success is a game born from pain and developed slowly and consistently with self-awareness, compassion, bumps in the road, and patience.
There is a spectrum of self-development, and no matter where you are on it, do not give up. Submit to the Process, not the challenge itself.
People will help you, but first you must fully commit to helping yourself.
This may take quite a few tries before you are truly ready. So be it. You're not a bad person.
Fail forward: this is called "learning". If you are "lost" you are almost there! Keep leading!